"God moves in mysterious ways, His wonders to perform..." William Cowper

Monday, May 23, 2011

I'd Cross The Desert For Milk

Talk about original titles. This was the title of the first story I ever wrote, in third grade. I dug it out recently and thought it would be fun to share the first page. It's amazing that the same writing struggles I have now, twenty years later, are the same I had back then! (Although I'd like to think I've improved significantly at spelling, grammar, and showing instead of telling.) :)

One morning in May I woke up and I felt that this was going to be the happiest day anyone ever had.

Then I got up and made my bed. My mother was very surprised she said that there was no wrinkles. So, I looked. I was surprised also, there was not one wrinkle in it.

Then I went to eat breakfast. I saw bacon and eggs in my plate and said in a loud scream, "Grose!" "Laurin Kay Ramsy! my mother yelled, but she said nothing else. Maby this wasn't going to be the best day ever. So I sat down and ate my breakfast. It was delicious! I told my mother they were very good. She said, "thank you very much."

Then I went to brush my teeth. I loved brushing my teeth, but today I loved to brush them more then ever and after I did they were shinier than ever.

I was so excited for school! At school on every paper I got a 100!

Okay, I'll be surprised if anyone actually made it through that entry--and not just because of the bad grammar and spelling. I'd hate to be too hard on my third-grade self, but facts are facts: this first page is pretty boring. It's all setup for the next chapter, where the conflict begins (Laurin's father loses his job).

It's amazing how badly I still want to start a story by setting up, and not plunging the reader right into trouble from the get go. Reading this story I wrote twenty years ago has increased my awareness of my current weakness as a writer.

Did you write any stories as a child? Do you still have them?

1 comment:

  1. Heidi,

    The no wrinkles in the bed detail cracked me up! It gives me good insight into the main character;)

    And yes, I struggle with indulging in too much description as well. Some of my childhood stories are pretty boring, but it's always fun to go back and read.

    Neat to see how the Lord gave you the desire to write stories from such a young age. Can't wait to read your published books some day!